Literally my math teacher abandoned today’s lesson because some kid brought his kitten to school i don’t even know

1 day ago
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Tumblr Responses 

"And I’m on the sit sits."

1 day ago
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"Do it.
Get on the plane, get the train,
Walk 300 miles.
Get to her front door and tell her
“I know this is crazy
But I need you now.”
Our lives are too short to always be sensible,
Get the girl.
Distance makes no difference if your eyes light up when she laughs."

— FRS.   (via xoaprox)

1 day ago
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Daily Show correspondent Michael Che tries to find a safe place to report from.


1 day ago
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The improv team I was on in high school only had one rank: “co-captain.” If you joined the improv team, you were automatically a co-captain. It wasn’t to make everyone equal within the club dynamic or anything like that, we just all knew that we would have to list extracurriculars on our college applications, and you could make yourself look more impressive by putting “co-captain” without specifying how many other captains the team had or how a member becomes a captain. 

2 days ago
16,138 notes


tag your fucking spoilers

2 days ago
216,130 notes
  Anonymous: What's the most illegal thing you ever did?


At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

2 days ago
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apparently some guy named mark was trying to tell my mom he needed to speak with my dad about any financial transactions my mom was making because he was the man of the house and she did not take kindly to his implying that my dad was the primary breadwinner/person in charge in our family so


2 days ago
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Jean Louis Sabaji Spring-Summer 2014

2 days ago
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Nicki Minaj speaking on why she hired Vlogger Beat Face Honey as her personal makeup artist

2 days ago
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Craig Ferguson talks about Peter Capaldi. [x]


2 days ago
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On some real stuff though! Yes women in Delhi are saying what NEEDS to be said!

2 days ago
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Harry Potter (click and drag)

this is so cool


2 days ago
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*planet explodes* *removes one earbud* what

2 days ago
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2 days ago
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